Many couples enter couples therapy struggling with the complaint that married life just isn’t what they expected. This can often be a product of fantasies about marriage, which can make even a good relationship seem disappointing when it doesn’t match up. As an example, the author writes about one couple client who entered couples therapy two years after being married, after a year of being engaged, two and a half years of living together before marriage, and three years of dating before marriage. The wife’s primary complaint was that nothing changed after the marriage, not even their living situation, and so nothing about being married seemed special.
Read the full article here: Coming to Grips with Marriage: “This is It??”
Among the myriad differences between men and women that can make a marriage challenging, is the very difference in perspective between husbands and wives on marriage itself. Author Mark Gungor claims that women tend to view marriage as something dynamic, whereas men look at marriage as a safety zone, where they can relax and recuperate. Men get married thinking that everything is good and so tend not to view the marriage as something that needs to be worked on, while women may tend to get married thinking that everything is good, but could be better with effort.
Read the full article here: Marriage Advice: Men and Women Have Different Approaches to ‘Working’ on a Relationship
Bad marriages are something that we hear about a lot, and something marriage websites and blogs, such as the one which published this article, often talk about. A constant negative attention on marriages doesn’t mean that all marriages are bad or doomed to fail, however. In fact, many marriages are actually really good, built from two people who love each other and are committed to each other. One sign of a rock solid marriage is that your partner is the first person you want to tell when you have good news. Another good sign is if a fulfilling date night can involve just staying at home and spending time with your partner.
Read the full article here: 6 Signs Your Marriage is Rock Solid
In a newsletter about intimate conversations, Dr. Daniel B. Wile provided an example of two partners initiating an intimate conversation by confiding fears that they had been keeping to themselves, both worrying about being less important to their partner than their partner is to them. Someone asked Dr. Wile how an intimate conversation might still result if both people don’t share this fear and one partner actually agrees that their partner is less important to them. If they agree compassionately, an intimate moment will still result. However, even without compassion, an intimate moment can be directed by the therapist. The direction would be to rephrase the uncompassionate response in a confiding manner.
Read the full article here: Creating Intimate Conversations
Cognitive-Behavioral Marital Therapy (CBMT) is a type of therapy that seeks to help clients improve their relationships by teaching them to reduce conflict and change behaviors by addressing their cognitive, behavioral, and affective issues and teaching them to communicate more effectively about each issue. One strength of CBMT compared to other couple therapies is its emphasis on all three issues that couples face rather than focusing on just a single one. A weakness of this type of therapy could be that it is too directive, relying too much on a therapist to set the pace of the conversation and even hand out homework to the couple.
Read the full article here: CBMT Couples Therapy